Going Camping
by Gwen1
Summary: The X-Men are dragged into the convieniently nearby state park by Logan. Then, stuff happens.
1. Default Chapter

Chapter One: Disaster Unrelated To the Brotherhood Strikes  
  
"Bub, you kids spend way too much time broodin'," Logan announced. Cheerfully. The X-Men took this as a definite warning sign. "Look who's talking," Scott whispered. "Ve are teenagers. Zat is vhat ve do," Kurt pointed out, looking up from the TV. "Well, I aim to put a stop to it," Logan said, turning to the watching Charles. "Chuck, I propose that I take these kids on a camping trip!" "That sounds like a wholesome idea," the Professor said. "You may take the kids into the conveniently nearby National Forest during spring break, Logan. Since spring break conveniently starts tomorrow, you better get packing." A chorus of "No, no, no, please don't do this to us!" came from the shocked lips of six frightened teenagers. "Well, they're only worried about our mental well-being," Jean said to the rest of the students. "Jean?" Kitty said. "Yes?" "Shut up!" Rogue finished as visions of camping with Logan crossed everybody's minds. 


	2. Chapter Two: The Crack of Dawn

Chapter Two: The Crack of Dawn  
  
(A/N: Sorry, forgot my disclaimer. I know I fooled you all, right? Don't own X-Men Evolution, etc., etc.)  
  
The next day, at the crack of dawn, five disgruntled and yawning teenagers piled their bags in the back of the X-Van and climbed into seats. As the sun came up, Logan came out with Xavier and Storm. "Where the hell is Kurt?" Logan asked after doing a quick head count. "He, like, never came out," Kitty said, yawning. "Well, then we'll just have to get him, won't we?" Logan smirked. "Kitty, would you go fetch Kurt instead of leaving him to Logan's tender mercies?" Professor Xavier asked. "Like, sure," Kitty said, phasing through the door of the van. Kitty phased through the floor of Kurt's bedroom. He was still asleep. "Like, wake UP!" Kitty shouted in his ear. Kurt's tail twitched and he groaned, pulling the covers over his head. Kitty yanked them off and jumped on Kurt. "Oof!" Kurt groaned. "Kitty, if you vanted me zat badly, couldn't you have at least vaited until after breakfast?" "KURT!" "Fine, fine, I'm getting up," he groaned, rolling out of bed and glancing out of the window. "Vhy are ve getting up at ze crack of dawn?" "We're going camping, duh." "Zen I better pack..." "You haven't packed yet?!" Kitty shouted, advancing on him. "Kidding, kidding..." Ten minutes later, Kitty dragged a yawning Kurt to the van. Logan slammed shut the door as Kitty got in and got in himself, locking the doors so no one could escape conventionally. "See you," he said to Storm and the Professor. "Goodbye Logan," Xavier replied. "Farewell children." "Goodbye Logan. Good luck children," Storm said, waving as they drove off. 


	3. Chapter Three: Hours Later

Chapter Three: Two Hours Later  
  
"Und here I alvays zought zat ze crack of dawn vas just an expression," Kurt murmured, sandwiched between Cyclops and Evan in the back. His image inducer was turned on so nobody could see him through the windows. "Well, bub, now you know different," Logan growled over his shoulder, honking the horn at someone who cut him off in the heavy traffic. "When are we going to, like, get there?" Kitty asked from the passenger seat. "If you kids ask me that question, I will kill you," Logan remarked, flipping someone across from them off. "Can we listen to music?" Jean asked from the captain seats she shared with Rogue. "I don't care, just quit asking me questions!" Kitty squealed with happiness and turned the radio on. Suddenly, N*Sync played at a very high volume blared from the speakers. Everyone but Kitty and Jean shrieked and covered their ears, cringing. Even Logan did, which would have had disastrous results if the car had been moving in the traffic. "Turn it off!" chorused from almost everybody in the car. Evan, extremely distressed, involuntarily began growing spikes out of his body. "Stop zat!" Kurt yelped. "Will you turn that goddamn music OFF!" Logan shouted, taking hold of the wheel again. Kitty sulkily turned off the radio. "Now what are we going to, like, do?" "Bub, I don't care as long as you keep quiet." "This is, like, so boring." "Will you stop whining?!" Rogue shouted, glaring at Kitty. "Will you, like, stop glaring at everybody you come in contact with?!" "Can't you talk for a single sentence without saying 'like'?!" "Can't you even make an attempt to be cheerful?!" "Can't you two stop arguing for one minute?!" Scott shouted. "NO!" the two chorused, turning and glaring at him. "If we make them share a tent, they're going to rip one another's throats out," Evan observed as the continued to yell insults at one another. "Und, at ze moment, does zat zound like zuch a bad thing?" 


	4. Chapter Four: Two and a Half Hours later

Chapter Four: Two and a Half Hours Later  
  
"Vhy vould anyone in zeir right mind actually vant to do zis?" Kurt asked as he and Evan struggled with the last tent. "Did we want to do this?" Evan replied, watching as Scott slapped yet another huge mosquito. "Not to mention the fact that we're not even allowed to use our powers. 'It's us against nature, bub, and unless you're willing to get your hands dirty, nature'll win.'" Scott mimicked the lecture Logan had given them as he continued trying to start a fire without matches. "Scott, Logan just wants to give us a good education in survival training," Jean admonished, dumping another armload of wood down by the nonexistent fire. "Damn right, bub. Now get busy with that fire. Night's falling," Logan barked, walking up. "You boys have that tent up yet?" "Nein," Kurt said, hammering a spike into the ground as Evan held up the tent. "Well, hurry up. That is, unless you want to sleep on the ground tonight." "I thought that sleeping in a tent meant you were, like, sleeping on the ground," Kitty said, walking up with firewood. "Duh," Rogue said, right behind her with kindling wood. "Like, shut up!" "You shut up!" "Like, you!" "You! Every time you open your ditzy little mouth something stupid crawls out!" The two were silenced as thunder rumbled above their heads. "Yes!" Scott shouted as his kindling caught fire and a small flame came to life. Just then, rain started pouring down, instantly dousing the fire. "GOD DAMN IT!" Scott screamed. Everybody stared at Scott. "Uhh...geez, well, that was, um, inconvenient," Scott murmured, blushing. "In your tents!" Logan barked. Everybody scrambled into their tents. Boys to one, girls to the other, and Logan to his own. "Kurt, you smell like wet dog," Evan muttered. "Shut up," Kurt growled, tinkering with his 'watch.' "It's on ze fritz," he declared, taking it off and tossing it in his bag. "Did Logan bring another one?" "Nope," Scott said, rolling out his sleeping bag. "What you see is what we have." "You know what?" Evan asked. "Vhat?" "We should run away!" Evan announced proudly. "What?!" Scott yelped. "Kurt doesn't even have his watch!" "Vell, I do blend in vith ze dark," Kurt mused. "Ve could vait until Logan vill have fallen asleep und zen get ze girls und run for it! As long as ve are back at ze mansion before daylight..." "Yeah! We could be back before morning," Evan said. "Well, anything's better than an extended weekend with Logan out here," Scott admitted. "Then it's settled!" Evan announced. "Yeah, ve vill go und get ze girls in one und a half hours," Kurt finished. 


	5. Chapter Five: In the Middle of the Night

Chapter Five: One and a Half Hours Later  
  
"Jean, Rogue, Kitty," Scott said through the screen of the tent. "Go away, Scott. Ah'm trying to sleep," Rogue grumbled. "Ve are making a break for it. Do you vant to come?" Kurt asked. "You mean we can actually, like, get out of this place?" Kitty asked, poking her head through the tent. "Yup," Scott said. "Get dressed and meet as at the fire ring in the clearing." "Like, sure," Kitty said, "anything to get out of here, you know?" Five minutes later, the group was gathered in the clearing. "Come on," Scott said, leading the group into the woods, the soft red light emitted from his visor lighting their way. After about ten minutes of walking, Jean stopped, leaning on a tree. "I have two questions," she announced. "First of all, where's Kurt? I can't see him." "I am right here," Kurt said, touching her wrist. "Okay. Second of all, who here knows where we're going?" "We're going to the highway," Scott said, impatient to get further from Logan and his heightened senses. "How do we get there?" "We go southwest." "Which direction are we heading?" "I'm...not sure..." Scott said, trailing off into silence. "Vhat do you mean, you're not sure?!" Kurt said, grabbing Scott by the shoulders. "Do you know vhat vould happen if zomebody found me, lost, in ze daylight?! Zey vould shoot me!" "Calm down, Kurt," Evan said, pulling him away from Scott. "No one's gonna shoot anybody." "Vhy did I agree to zis?" Kurt moaned. "Now ve don't even know vhere ze hell ve are." "I've, like, got an idea!" Kitty said brightly. "Wow, there's a once in a lifetime sight," Rogue muttered. "Kurt," Kitty began, shooting Rogue a dirty look, "can climb one of these trees and tell us what he sees." "Vhatever it takes to stay out of ze daylight," Kurt muttered climbing up a tall tree. Once he had gotten up, he peered around, his eyes able to through the dark. "I zee ze highway!" he shouted down. "Good! Come tell us where it is!" Jean shouted up. Kurt climbed down the tree and pointed to the left. "Ve vere going ze vrong vay," he said. "It's zat vay." "Good, let's go," Scott said, turning and walking off, the rest of the group following him. After several more minutes of walking in the dark of the forest, Kurt spotted something through the trees. "Zere's someone over there!"  
  
"Is it Logan?" Scott asked in a whisper, seeing the hideous consequences of tonight's breakout playing in his mind. "No.it looks like a teenager, but I can't really see it vell." "IT'S THE BROTHERHOOD!" Scott shouted, firing laser blasts at the unsuspecting victim.  
  
(A/N: Okay, here I'm trying to decide between narcissistically inserting myself into the storyline or having the Brotherhood gratuitously show up. Or both. Please review and tell me which would be better.) 


End file.
